Note: Before you read this post, I must warn you that the title has absolutely ZERO to do with the post. You may carry on.
Well today on this lovely day of the 17th of August, I am doing nothing. Well of course I’m blogging. And before I was blogging I was doing something. And before the something that I did before the blogging that I did before the nothing, I was doing something; but you get the point.
A few days ago (which was really yesterday, it just seems like it was forever ago), someone asked me to give some kind of thoughtful insight. Just anything (okay, they didn’t ASK me yesterday….I just answered yesterday, but we’re getting to that). So yesterday (see? told you) I was feeling particularly thoughtful. Yes, reader, I do think sometimes, I promise. And I wrote about this deep overwhelming sense of having love (I’ll post what I wrote at the bottom after I’m done). Now that I’ve had the chance to look back on it, I’ve discovered a few things. The first thought I had was, MAN am I smart sometimes. The second one was I wonder if everybody else knew I was this smart…’cause I didn’t. But the third thing (I promise it’ll get ore serious) was just wow. I know that some people might not particularly feel this way, and it might be different…you never know, maybe you just haven’t felt it yet. But I’d like to believe that this is some insight that’ll be useful to somebody. I mean, I needed a whole day of bad stuff to happen, and then a bunch of apologizing, and listening to the same song on repeat for at least 30 times for me to be able to push this out (even though I am better with communicating through papers and letter than verbally). Maybe that’s part of the reason while we have all this stuff to go through. So that we can have some learned lessons under our belts before we move on to the next and bigger step in life (for me it’d be college, for you…who knows? maybe it’s marriage or retirement or something).
But I think it’s weird how sometimes, you can be filled with this incredible overpowering love for someone, but not exactly LOVE them. Maybe that’s how it feels to be in love…when you have that feeling that you want to give that person your heart…just to see what they’ll do with it, and if they’ll love you back.