GUYS, I WANT A REINDEER CAKE TOO
Me: COME LOOK AT SVEN.
*Sister looks over shoulder*
Me: See his lil antlers?
My Sister: No, I didn’t see the antlers. Why’s he blue…
My Other Sister: Because he’s cold
No, I don’t want an award or a pat on the back or a gift certificate for unlimited foot rubs just because I, a dad, did something that moms do all the time, because I know that makes the moms crazy – or as I like to call them, “the ladies,” but I do so ironically, which means they can’t call me sexist because I’m only pretending to be sexist while being, in fact, totally sexist. I love irony.
I also love my wife for taking care of most of the birthday party planning over the years and being wildly successful at it. She once created a version of Twister in which you not only had to place your foot or hand on a coloured circle but also had to eat weird food that matched that colour. Like the real Twister, this was fun for only so long. But no…
View original post 597 more words