My Review for Paper Towns by John Green:
John Green…I love you. Like, seriously love you. Are you married? Is there somewhere I can file a marriage request? Courting request? Dating request? Polishing shoes request? I’ll do one of them. Or two. Or all. It all works.
But I LOVE this book. The Fault in Our Stars is still the best…BUT THIS IS DEFINITELY THE SECOND. How come they’re not making a movie out of this one? I mean, I would totally watch it… and it wouldn’t even have be as heart-wrenching as the Stars movie is going to be. I mean, what actor wouldn’t want to fake-break into Sea World? I WOULD! I mean, I’m not an actor or anything….but still.
Now, I love it with all my heart (I really do) but we do have a few problemo’s…
1) Quentin was too mushy. John (can I call you John?), sweetheart (that too?), I know you were trying to make it all deep and fill up pages and what-not, but the conversations Q had with himself were a teeny bit too deep. I mean, I have deep thoughts and all, but not THAT deep. That’s like, drowning in the ocean after playing with sharks deep. At some points in the story, the deep-ness was good. I got it. But at other points…he should have had less girl-ish thoughts. Just saying.
2) Q was a tiny bit obsessed with Margo. For real. Long-time crush or no, that’s kinda creepy.
But otherwise, I think it was all good. I FREAKING LOVED THE ROAD TRIP, though. That was by far my most FAVORITE part of the ENTIRE book.
Now about those shoe polishing requests…
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE May 15, 2014
Guys, if you never ever do anything else for me, PLEASE look at this website. It’s a ridiculously amazing cause, and I’m thinking about buying the hardbook.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go calculate how much I can spend without going broke.
https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/altered-perceptions#home
and/or
If You Don’t Want To Hear A Rant, I Suggest You Not Read This And Go Look At Pictures Of Kitties Or Puppies Or Rainbows Or Unicorns Or Something May 14, 2014
Guys, I am so mad at everybody right now. Like, no joke and everything. I am so mad right now.
Except I type suspiciously calmly when I’m mad…til I start busting out caps. Then I get kinda carried away.
Okay, so I have this flip-phone (….DON’T ASK QUESTION THIS ISN’T ABOUT MY 30-YEAR OLD PHONE) and I was TRYING to set up my voicemail account because I have like, 5 in the voicemail box thingy.
So I called Customer Service when it asked me for a pass code (because I don’t have a freaking pass code).
And she told me to put in the last four digits of my phone number.
Then the phone said that this wasn’t a valid number, try again.
So she was all like “Okay, since this isn’t working, I’m going to have to reset your inbox. And all your voicemails will be deleted” which OBVIOUSLY worried me a little bit, but I said “And nothign else on the phone will change? Just all the voicemails will be deleted?” and she said yes. I, being my reasonable self, said okay…but only because I’d have a brand new shiny voicemail box when it was all over.
So I turned off my phone.
Then I turned on my phone.
AND THE EFFING THING STILL WOULDN’T WORK.
So we did it again…..and again…AND AFREAKINGGAIN AND IT STILL WOULDN’T WORK, AND WE ENDED UP WASTING 15 OF MY DARN FREAKING EFFING MINUTES (I have to pay for each phone call and text I send *my parents trying to teach me responsibility*).
So naturally, I’m as mad as heck , because I HAD TO PAY FOR ALL THOSE EFFING MINUTES and those voicemails were deleted.
WHAT IF MY FRIEND IS IN JAIL AND THEY USED THEIR ONE PHONE CALL ON ME?
WHAT IF SOMEBODY GAVE A PRODUCER MY PHONE NUMBER, AND THEY WERE CALLING ME?
WHAT
IF
IT
WAS
MY
CRUSH
THAT
MOVED
WAS FINALLY CALLING TO ADMIT HIS EVERLASTING LOVE AND ADMIRATION OF/FOR ME!!??? (…keeping in mind that with him, this could completely be a possibility. I’m not even kidding).
STUPID TRACFONE CUSTOMER SUPPORT, I HATE YOU SO MUCH
Now back to your regularly scheduled program.
P.S. I’m still mad.
P.P.S. I CAN’T BELIEVE THEM WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS TO ME AREN’T THEY SUPPOSED TO LOVE THEIR CUSTOMERS??
P.P.P.S. I WASN’T EVEN MEAN ABOUT IT OR ANYTHING! I DIDN’T EVEN HANG UP ON HER WHEN I REALIZED SHE WAS SLOWLY SLAUGHTERING MY NEAR BROKE-NESS!
P.P.P.P.S. I WAS TRYING TO ONLY USE TEN MINUTES THIS WEEK, BUT NOOOOOO NOW I HAVE 20 FREAKING MINUTES USED UP! I JUST GOT THOSE ON SUNDAY! WHY IS THE WORLD SO MEAN TO ME??
P.P.P.P.P.S. WHAT IF THAT ACTUALLY WAS MY CRUSH?? I’LL NEVER KNOW FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE WHO LEFT THOSE MESSAGES! I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY COULDN’T JUST GO GET ME MY CODE OR SOMETHING DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:
P.P.P.P.P.P.S. While I am still REALLY mad at these people, I won’t sue….because I am THE MOST GENEROUS PERSON THEY WILL EVER ENCOUNTER IN THEIR WHOLE ENTIRE LIVES, and I’ll probably be almost completely over this by tomorrow-ish.
Back to your regularly scheduled program(s).